


i'll bleed and fight for you

by fallingwinterrose



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Broken Promises, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Family Feels, Father-Son Relationship, Gen, Hamilton Lyrics, Hamilton References, Hurt/Comfort, Mother-Son Relationship, One Shot, Promises, Sad, Short, Short & Sweet, Short One Shot, Shorts, Song: Dear Theodosia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:47:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24271564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallingwinterrose/pseuds/fallingwinterrose
Summary: the legacy of unkept promises follows him, but harry is resolute / broken promises made him keep his own / for ql (crossposted from ffn)
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter
Kudos: 11





	i'll bleed and fight for you

**Author's Note:**

> a/n: credits to the incredible allison for helping me flesh out the plot idea :)  
> (the lyric from dear theodosia included in this fic is "i swear that i'll be around for you" (and some others, but that's the main intact one)  
> originally posted on ffn for the quidditch league forum. prompts are below if you care, but if you don't just go on to the story i suppose :)  
> //  
> chaser 2, qlfc forum, puddlemere united  
> season eight, round three  
> main prompt:  
> Dear Theodosia: Write about making a promise to someone.  
> optional prompts:  
> 1\. (emotion) regret  
> 11\. (word) legacy  
> 15\. (relationship) father/child  
> word count: 1081

Lily's smile is radiant as the nurse hands Harry over to her, bundled in fabric. "Look how handsome our baby is, James," she says softly, cradling the newborn.

"He has your eyes."

"And your hair." Lily laughs. "Merlin, that's going to be a pain for him, isn't it?"

"We'll teach him to embrace the disarray."

In the midst of war, the moment seems encased in an impenetrable bubble.

When Dumbledore warns them to hide, Lily is terrified. She puts on a brave face, of course, just as she's always done… but internally, she's afraid. Of course she is; the Dark Lord is targeting her newborn son, and there's no good that can come out of that.

When they get to Godric's Hollow, Lily sets Harry down in his crib and smiles at him. She's still scared, still anxiously going over every possibility in her head, but Harry doesn't know that.

"Harry," she says. The word formed in her mouth is filled with love. "I love you, do you know that? And I hope you'll never forget that. No matter what happens." She swallows. Hard. A tear leaks down her cheek. "I won't let You-Know-Who affect your life. You don't deserve that, my darling… I swear that I'll always be here for you, alright? I love you Harry, and I promise that he'll never be a part of your life."

"I'm not sure whether you can keep that promise, Lil."

Lily whirls around, her heart suddenly beating frantically. "Oh Merlin, James, you can't just sneak up on me like that! How long have you been there?"

"Around the time you started crying."

Lily furiously wipes away her tears. "Ugh. I just… He's hurt our lives so much already, taken so many people we love. I don't want Harry to ever have to face that sort of suffering."

"Don't worry," James soothes, stepping to her side. "He won't. We're safe here." As if to prove a point, he turns toward Harry and says, "I promise, Harry, you'll never lose us."

When green light hits him, James remembers that promise. Regret swells up inside of him, the regret that he will never be able to keep it… his broken promise will be the extent of their relationship… he will never see his precious boy grow up, go to Hogwarts… and then darkness envelops him.

That night, that horrible Hallow's Eve, Sirius feels a sinking feeling in his stomach. He finds Peter's safehouse desolate, yet intact. It doesn't feel quite right. There's something wrong; and then he finds the Potters' home in Godric's Hollow destroyed.

One of his best friends is dead. Another is a traitor.

Sirius digs through the rubble, afraid of what he'll find, but needing to do so anyway.

James, his best mate, dead to the world, lies near where the door used to be, and Lily lies unmoving next to Harry's crib.

"Harry," Sirius chokes out when he finds him, alone amidst the rubble. "Oh, Harry…"

The little baby, barely a year old, is the striking image of his father. Except for the bright green eyes, which belonged to his mother. He's both of them, two of his best friends that are now… gone.

"You know, Harry," Sirius says, picking Harry up in his arms and bouncing the little child, "my father wasn't around. Well, he was, but he was kind of a bloody jerk, you know? Oh Merlin, Lily would kill me for cursing around you. Sorry, Harry." Sirius swallows down the lump in his throat, trying not to cry; his father's voice still rings in his head ("only idiots cry").

"I wished I had a better father when I was little. When I was older, I had Mr. Potter, James' dad, your grandpa…" He stifled a sob. "But I don't want that to happen to you, Harry. I found my family years after I should've had one. And that… that damaged me, Harry, and I won't let that happen to you." He suddenly felt fiercely angry, at what exactly he wasn't sure. "I'm not going to let that happen to you, okay? I swear. I swear that I'll be around for you, Harry. I'll do whatever it takes."

He is prevented from keeping his promise until Harry is already 13. When he sees how much Harry has suffered with the Dursleys, the toll it has taken on him, that broken promise becomes the greatest regret of his life. It is still his greatest regret when he falls through the Veil, realizing that his blind mistake has cost him his life and caused him to leave his godson alone again, doing what he'd sworn to never do.

After the Battle of Hogwarts, after it truly hits him how many they've lost, Harry still has no time to break down. He has things to do. Remus and Tonks are gone, and their son, Harry's godson, newly orphaned, is at the Tonks' home.

He knocks on the door and is answered by a tearful Andromeda Tonks. "Come in," she says. Harry nods, unable to speak.

He finds Teddy asleep in his crib.

Harry stops dead at the doorway and stares at the child. The little boy that has no idea what he's lost, the life no longer possible for him. His eyes prickle, tears threatening to escape. But he can't do that right now. He has to be strong now, because though Teddy's grandmother might still be alive, he is Teddy's godfather.

Remus and Tonks died, just as James and Lily did. Sirius wasn't able to protect Harry, but Harry swears he won't go down the same path.

He walks over to the crib, and Teddy wakes. He stares up at Harry with rapidly morphing eyes.

"Hi," Harry says with a sad smile. "I'm so sorry, Teddy. You have no idea what's happened, but it's going to affect the rest of your life. You're going to miss a real father. Merlin knows I'm not ready to be one yet, and Andromeda will never really be your mother… But I promise your life won't be hell, okay, Teddy? I won't let the world hurt you, I—" he closes his eyes for a moment to keep the tears from falling "—will be there for you. I swear that I'll be around for you, Teddy. I'll do whatever it takes."

The legacy of unkept promises follows him, but Harry is resolute. He will never let Teddy feel the pain he did.

He keeps his promise.


End file.
